Letters to President-elect Obama

Dear Mr. President-elect Obama,

While riding the bus down Pięnka St in Warsaw, Poland, I saw one of the harshest, most hideous buildings in the city. And what would be flying from that building? Why, an American flag! You guessed it, Mr. Obama, it was the US Embassy, looking more like the hang out for people awaiting execution than a building of safety for Americans abroad and a show of goodwill toward Poland. And this cannot just be simply passed off as fitting in with the trend of Warsaw embassy architecture. No, sir. The only other atrocity on the same level of disgust as our great nation’s experiment with cement is the Russian Embassy. Since when did the US and Russia decide to become twinsies? Are our soldiers going to start wearing matching hats now? Wait, did you hear something? Oh, don’t worry, that was just Roosevelt and Eisenhower screaming from their graves.

The other embassies hold true to Piękna, they are beautiful, as I’m sure you know the word means. Most, from Switzerland, United Kingdom, Hungary, are light pastel painted seventeenth century buildings, gated estates with their flag flying high and a lovely garden surrounding the walk way. They give pride, beauty and justice to their own country’s past and give hope to their people by carrying that culture like a light into the future and to far-away lands. They are homes away from homes. And, then, there stands the US of A, a dirty, gray, cement brick with a guard house in front of the building.

I suggest one of your first moves as president to improve foreign relations is to renovate our embassy in Poland. Share the beauty of the States with the world. You know we need this as much as I do. The US just can’t be twinsies with Russia and friends with Poland.

In solemn sincerity,

A Concerned Citizen

Oh, look, what lovely symbols of countries! Hungary and Switzerland must be swell nations.

Wait, is this the same street? It is, and that is the US Embassy. The flower beds in front aren't cuttin' it.

And this, taken in haste as to not arouse suspicion in the guards, is Russia.